My Testimony: From Death to Life

Ten years ago, today, I passed from darkness to light. I’d like to take a few moments to tell you about it.

I will be brief, as I know your time is valuable. In fifth grade, my parents got divorced. In middle school, I started smoking, drinking, and discovered an addiction to opiods. From fifteen until twenty five years of age, my drug addiction grew. It wasn’t just drugs. I almost killed myself and two friends, crashing head on into a tree, drunk driving at sixteen. But it was opiods that grabbed me.

I remember many nights, falling to sleep on methadone or oxycontin, praying that I would wake up. I could tell that my breathing was so slow that I might just shut down in my sleep. I can recall several times that I had to call people to pick me up in the middle of nowhere because I could not even keep my eyes open. I knew that if something didn’t change, my parents were going to have to bury me. So I did everything in my power to quit. I went to the doctor, who prescribed me valium…didn’t work. I quit cold turkey…didn’t work. I tried to wean myself. Once again…it did not work.

Then a friend told me about Jesus, invited me to church, and then “suckered” me into watching The Passion of the Christ (“suckered” because I thought it would be like Braveheart or something). After watching this movie, I felt like I needed to look more into this “Messiah,” to see if He was real. I had always viewed Jesus as similar to a greek God, even Hercules (half man/half god). I thought that weak, uneducated people followed Jesus, but I saw all kinds of people at this movie…balling their eyes out. I wondered if they, perhaps, knew something I didn’t…

I began to read the Bible every night, and I even prayed that God would reveal Himself to me. After a few months of reading, my desire for the truth only grew. I was still hooked on drugs the whole time, but God was drawing me.

Let me jump to the chase. Searching for answers, I went to church for the next year or so. I even had some intense experiences where God was revealing Himself to me. Then on August 18, 2005, I was at Truth Temple Church, in Kannapolis, NC, praying with some believers. What is crazy about this is that I was upset…while I was praying…because my Percocet had not kicked in like I had hoped. All of the sudden it hit me. Or it would be better to say, He hit me. He flattened me. For the first time, I realized how serious my sin was, and how my whole life was offensive to Him. I was a hypocrite, a drug addict, a liar, full of lust…you name it.

So I cried out to Him in repentance. I explained to Him that I had tried my best to be the man He wanted me to be…I had tried to get off drugs and resist temptation…but I continued to fail. In my own words, I explained to Him what I later found in Romans 7:14-24. I didn’t understand what I did. The things I knew I should do, I didn’t do. The things I knew I should not do, I always ended up doing. I was a slave to sin. I was a wretched man. I deserved hell…but it wasn’t long after that that I found out who could deliver me from this body of death…Thanks be to God…through Jesus Christ our Lord!

That night, I completely surrendered. I even remember saying, “God, I know that you don’t normally do it this way, but in my case would you please just take it from me? I have tried to do it myself, but can’t. Please just do it for me.” I thought that it was on me; that I had to clean myself up. Well, He did it alright. Though I went to bed that night feeling as guilty as ever, I woke up the next morning and everything was different. Though I had been on opiods for as long as I could remember, I had no desire to find pills that morning. And I wasn’t feeling any withdrawal symptoms. I felt brand new. As if I had passed from death to life. That is exactly what happened! All my sins had been washed away, and God completely delivered me from the drugs and other addictions.

Not long after that, God took me places I never thought I would go. I have had the greatest experiences in ministry, God brought me a wonderful, beautiful wife, He has blessed me with four amazing children, and He has continued to lead me deeper into His truth. Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” That is not talking about big houses and fancy cars. That is saying that He will give you the desires that He wants you to have and He will grant those desires to you. I can’t even begin to describe how blessed I am that I want to do things that I thought were ridiculous before I met Christ. How things have changed…

Ten years ago, I truly believed that nothing would stop the downward spiral toward a certain death via overdose. He saved me though. Thank you Jesus! My favorite verse is 2 Corinthians 5:17, which says, “Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed way; behold, all things have become new.” That’s me…and that can be you too. I wonder if you are like I was. You think that you have to clean yourself up before coming to Christ. You can’t do it. Believe me. But if you surrender your life to Him, you will experience freedom that I cannot even begin to describe. Do it today.